Have you ever tried to get confirmation from someone else? Did you feel like everything would magically be honky dory if someone else gave you a thumbs up for what you do? I can honestly say that in the past I have. I understand, as humans, we all need some type of encouragement to help us along the way; yet, at times I feel we need to realize that it isn’t always necessary. Just fyi, I made this realization yesterday. So please don’t feel as if I’m picking on you, I’m just sharing what I’ve learned.
You can’t wait on anyone else to justify who you are or what you want to do in life. Don’t get me wrong. We aren’t all born knowing who we are or what we want to do but you are supposed to use this journey through life as a lesson towards that epiphany. For those, like me, that take a little more time to figure out the odds and ends; you must learn who you are and what you want to do by making some mistakes.
Unlike anything you may have been taught, mistakes aren’t all bad. I’ve made some beautiful mistakes and gotten some bumps and bruises that have developed me into the strong, creative spirit I am today. When I say “make some mistakes” I mean try new things, open your mind and take some leaps of faith to see where you land. Sometimes there will be rough landings but once you’ve gained full consciousness, you might like your new surroundings.
Take me for instance, I graduated from Vidalia High School in May of 2005 and went straight to college at Georgia Southern University in August 2005 expected to graduate in four years to then go onto Medical School to become a general surgeon. I couldn’t decide on a specific type of surgery, so general it was. LOL. Lovely picture, right? Very much so, but it was a picture I hand painted. I didn’t realize I forget to paint myself into the picture.
I had to go that specific route because that’s what I told myself and my parents. That’s what I believed I had to stick to because of how many times I had told them; and if I did anything else I KNEW I would be letting them down. I needed that confirmation from my parents and for whatever reason I thought I wouldn’t get it if I didn’t close off my future into a tiny square box. (BTW, my parents are like super supportive and have always been but I have always had a predisposition to not disappoint them because they were always so supportive. Sounds like a catch 22, right? It is.)
As a pre-med Georgia Southern student, my pre chosen major (not my choice)was Chemistry. Sadly I hated Chemistry but hey I changed to Biology and then hey I realized I hated pre-med. Though I knew I hated pre-med, I stuck it out for 2 years because that’s all I knew. In reality, I would have now clue what I wanted to do until after 1 year of Chem pre-med, 1 year of Bio pre-med followed by 1 year of pre-nursing.
If that wasn’t a mistake, I don’t know what is. LOL. Although, my mistake was necessary for me to know where I didn’t want to be. I became 100% aware of my meant to be major through the wonderful world of extracurricular activities. To be exact, through the African Students Association. To be even more exact because of the V.P. of ASA at the time, Kofo, and the ASA advisor/mentor, Dr. Jallow. (Thanks, you two!!!)
After being placed (not quite by my choice) into a Community Service Chair position and then choosing (on my own) to become the Public Relations Chair, my fate was sealed. Public Relations was my thing! I didn’t exactly know what I was doing, but I was doing it, meeting people and having fun. I had crashed landed into paradise.
So long story short and still kind of long. I have made my mistakes, felt defeated, cried, dried my tears, tripped over my own two feet, busted my knee, got some help, cried again, received some necessary encouragement, built a plan, flew, crashed, exploded, flew again and learned from everything.
I blossomed and learned in my own sweet time and I am thankful for everything that happened.
No matter what others try to “pre-do” for you, you have to decide if it’s what you want to do. Even when you think you are doing the right thing, you can certainly be wrong. Especially when you have people behind you and because those people are behind you, you think that you have to keep going for them. You don’t. Keep going for you. Or stop and start back up with something else if you need to. Make sure you find out who you are and what you want. Otherwise, you could end up miserable; if you are always trying to get confirmation from someone else.
Words to inspire from me to inspire you.
– I LIve to InspIre